Let the Journey begin...

So it has come to my attention (as if I didn't already know) that I have spent the last year or two alienating those close to me. I wish I had a good excuse for this... or even better, a good reason. But I don't. All I know is that in the last year and a half my life, my thoughts about myself, my beliefs on big issues, and my perspective on life have all changed drastically. And the transition has been painful. And it's been even more painful to watch me try and Forest Gump my way through all of this. And my mentality has been that it would be easier to crawl into a hole and handle all of this on my own in hopes that after it all passed I would be able to emerge this strong beautiful butterfly and return to my life just as I had left it. Clearly that is not how things work. And along the way I have hurt my friends, strained my friendships, and cheated myself out of the chance to not go through all of this alone. But here I am.... slowly making my way to the other side, ready to pick up the pieces from all the mistakes I've made in the last few years and to move on with experience in one pocket and a plan in the other. I have a feeling I've lost some people along the way... whether it is their respect, their trust, or just their interest. But I am hoping that most of those I care about can look passed most of these mistakes I have made and can continue on this journey with me. The last few years have been hard... and I have a feeling the next few will not come without their fair share of difficulties as well. But I'm ready for it. Here we go.